Planning to live in Retirement Edition 10: Hopes Game Plan

     

Photo at Pexel.com

     By end of tomorrow, January will be half over. All the lead up to Christmas and the new year is old news. My daughter's birthday is over, Happy 24th. The fact that all my children are now older than when I became a parent is amazing to me. I honestly thought by now I'd have a much larger family, instead, my family has gotten smaller. I have no say in other people's lives and choices, but it's a circumstance to me that I can't say doesn't make me a bit wistful. That being said, I need to concentrate on building my own sense of purpose with my life and with my family. 

     On New Year's Day I shared hopes for the coming year. With extending my work life past the first quarter, I didn't want to delay efforts, even though #1 will take longer.  Here's the list and a few things I've done to start making progress. 

1. Successful transition to retirement: 

• Update my budget in light of delayed timeline 
• Update my calendar to account for the 5 more work weeks 

2. Continue to lose excess weight while getting stronger and improving my health:

•  First step, getting the 6 pounds off that crept back on somewhere between my birthday in November and last week. ( I've lost 2 so far).  I'm going to focus back on intermittent fasting where I only consume calories between 11 and 7, or 12 and 8 depending on my schedule. I can tell that the extra "small" snacks here and there, along with the holiday higher calorie food, has not been good for me. 
• I joined but now have to actually participate in the  city walking club. 
• Had an audiology appointment to see what next steps might be to improved hearing. It's been getting worse. I'm looking at insurance discounts, because there doesn't seem to be any real coverage, before committing to the type and brand and will follow up with audiologist once I understand options better. It's going to be a big bite out of my savings; I had no clue how expensive hearing aids are. But, the trade-off should be worth getting rid of the increasing frustration as my hearing worsened. 

3.Expand my social circle through activities:

• One is same as Hope 2, participate in the walking club.
• Relook at the Better after 50 group through church. The fall activities were not conducive to my knee recovery, then there was a pause over the holiday season and retirement celebration for our pastor. February is bowling and I enjoyed that last year. It might help me find my faith a bit with church people I enjoyed seeing again or meeting last year at the events I joined.

4.Affordable and (some) slow travel:

•  Booked weekend road trip with my sisters. This is a start to more travel in my own back yard. 
• Joined both a slow travel and a widowed travel group on Facebook. For now, these just generate ideas, but I'm learning little things to consider. 

5.Live more sustainably:

•  Saved ruined towels for dogs and for floor "swifters".
• Buying more bulk dried beans; having black, navy, and pinto beans ready for soups  and stews will be useful, but dry chickpeas are hard to find.

6.Improve relationships while establishing my own needs within them. 

• Had an honest talk with my youngest who has been a bit challenging in her criticism of both extending my work time and my need to get more things purged. It's going to be an ongoing challenge but we're talking things through. 
• I tried to be probably too polite, but now am being firmer, so might come off rude or disrespectful as I never used to say boo; I'm choosing to not let it go when people either give me flippant and insincere platitudes or unsolicited "advice" that really is just unasked for opinions. I've had a few winner comments in the last few months, totally unprompted by me, that crossed multiple lines and I spoke up. As for my needing therapy ( as in, "Have you thought of going to therapy? You should.", that's where this new resolve is coming from. 
• The second anniversary of my husband's death is Saturday. I mailed cards to my MIL, SIL, and BIL, acknowledging their loss too and shared a good memory with each of them. They were my family for 35 years and still are my children's. Part of moving forward though is that while I can still keep a place for them in my life and vice versa, I need to also be free to step away from expectations, even if just perceived by myself. Tuesday they all are going on a full family vacation. I opted to not join, but am hoping my kids enjoy the time with family. 

7. Taking the wheel, steering the rudder, of my own life. See all of the above. 

      I didn't make any true resolutions. Supposedly, at least according to a television commercial, the 2nd Friday in January is called quitters day. I guess if I make no resolutions, I can't be a quitter.  Still, I want to be accountable to myself, and that's the action for Hope 7.