Sam Squared

      An extra post from my health goals update that I posted this morning. It did help to unload yesterday. For those that read, commented, or just scrolled by but came back again, thank you. Words matter and when trapped in head space, they can churn into messages and commentary that is at best unproductive and at worst, debilitating. It's two people really that are difficult to be near when cornered, plus the continuation of decades of "dings" from MIL. Honestly, I doubt she'd think they're dings, just her trying to be helpful and I'm just the difficult one.  There are people in my husband's family that are absolutely lovely so an added level that would make walking away sad. There's also some shared property in my kids names and responsibility there. All the words of wisdom are being taken to heart though so I appreciate you.  Blogging is like opening an escape hatch to let my feelings out before imploding.       I opted to get a few basi...

       It's a new month of Wednesdays; though I did not post last week, I started tracking. I'm going to use midweek again to check in and keep the same goals as I've had previously.  Lose five pounds. To be clear, this is 5 pounds for the month, not the week. If I could stretch to 6.5, getting that extra 8 ounces off, I'd be ecstatic. I weighed myself on July 1 but didn't get today-was down 1 pound since losing the post vacation weight gain. Better than gaining.   Walk 10 miles per week. Definitely on target .  Strength and weight resistance exercise two hours per week. This has been closer to 1 hour, 2 /10 minutes session 3 days a week.  Ensure I have at least six fruit and veg servings per day with at least three being vegetables. I had a carb heavy weekend but improved by Sunday.  Resume 16-8 intermittent fasting , meals/ snacks only between 12-8, but aiming for nothing past 7:00. The 8:00 gives me flexibility for nights like trivi...

         I'm getting these off my mind and onto the blog. July seems to be a cyclical downturn for my mental health. Maybe not bottling things up will help. Maybe it's because the last two July's have been challenging months. First, 2023 marked the 6 month of losing my husband. Literally everyone but me and my kids had moved on as if he was just a momentary blip in their lives. I was still in paperwork and other admin hell and so incredibly sad, lonely, and felt entirely overwhelmed. Dealing with getting the Equinox title transferred so I could buy the license tabs, which expired June 30, required escalation of having a letter sent from an attorneys office and wasn't resolved until September.      Last July a drunken relative ruined July 4th by letting loose every thought and opinion he had about how me and my kids either stupidly had handled things or what, if we had any common sense and would just move on, we should be doing by now, and said ver...

      The weather played games, or couldn't decide what to tell the meteorologists. We all ended up closer to home yesterday due to reports of thunderstorms throughout the day. We had a few bouts of downpours and MIL said they only had some rain and seemed annoyed no one came up. After the horrible 4th of July last year when the washed out day led to too many people inside all day, some of who drank way too much and said way too much ( truly awful- so far out of line to me and my kids) none of us wanted to chance it. I think that was about the time when I had to take a major pause on blogging. It was bad and we  all keep said relative at more than an arms length since.       I know my husband's family thinks we're both weird and ungrateful for not wanting to spend every spare summer moment at the lake. I don't care. My nephew had three people with him, the brother in law's kids each brought a friend, a family friend couple and my sister-in-law's n...

                             I copy the previous week, delete the old and updated as I go along the week as a way even when busy and not in a blogging mindset I'm accountable to myself.  Here's my recap of Friday, June 27 to Thursday, July 3. I'm going to admit that I  was a walking oxymoron of a frugal person. I'll stretch a bag of $1.25 navy beans into a huge vat of soup but spend $3.50 a pound for pick your own strawberries when Aldi is carrying them for $1.79 a pound. (There was no comparison to the quality of the fresh picked berries and if I'm going to go to work of making jam and pie, I want great produce.) Avoiding Spending/ Saving on Needs After Friday's anniversary dinner out, no other eating out or take out. July has to be different than June on that line. I have a coffee meeting and lunch with an old friend next Thursday but that must be it for the rest of July. Started July spending on...

      Welcome July photo from Pexel.com free photos      2025 is half over. Why do the months and apparently the years go so fast as we reach a certain age? June was a mixed bag of success towards goals, but no one but myself is counting on me to achieve them, so no harm no foul. Still, it seems at least thinking about what I'd like to get accomplished is a good thing. My list is sort of suggested guideline, not a mandate. Some of these are repeats from June, and some were June fails, but I'd like to keep them on a regular basis. A "C" next to a goal is a continuation as in it was not completed in previous months but still needs to be and has an end point. A "R" means it's a repeated goal.  Financial : Shave $75 off budget grocery/ HH target of $575. I say target not budget because I feel like I have less control on costs, but control on what I buy. Since last month was going well until the final stretch, this seems entirely doable. R I plan to combi...