Being Loved and Being Needed
I think we're around the corner with kitten and kid healing. We've got at least another week of low activity for kitten and soft no chew food for the girl. My daughter would like nothing more than to bite into a big juicy burger, but the best I can do is some really soft scrambled eggs and mashed sweet potatoes. She's been eating big bowls of creamy oatmeal to start her day, and drinking smoothies with Greek yogurt, fruit, and protein powder, at least getting nourishment and calories. She's already a tiny thing. She and my other daughter are going to Dune later. I'm going to tackle putting the house to rights. Kitty will need to hang out in the pop-up kennel when I can't be right with him. One med is done as of 3:00, so I get to be a slightly less bad guy. Both she and the kitten have left a wake of chaos.
I hope I didn't come off as whiny and pathetic with my financial woe is me post. I know what I'm reducing in cash flow each month is all extras, no sacrifices to needs. I'm fortunate that I have financial safety nets, plus a good paying job now, even with wanting to get that chapter closed. I've a good brain for budgeting, at least I think so, and have sketched out a revision to manage these changes. People and pets will be taken care of, including myself. I'll spend time with my family and friends and weekend snow storm aside, enjoy spring when it arrives.
I'm writing these things out to remind myself that I have a lot of people and pets in my life that both love and rely on me. Leading into March, and then the financial dings at seemingly every corner, I've been feeling very unnecessary, like I'm just occupying space in the world. This picture from last Sunday night I guess represents a reminder that things might get better again. And that I'm loved and needed.
Financial adjustments & surprises are no fun, even when it doesn't reduce you to poverty level. It's okay to be concerned about changes & the impact to your life. I'm confident you will find a way to make it work, but in the moment, it's no fun & your response is totally reasonable. Meanwhile, I'm panicking about the increased cost of health care (adding me + the teens to M's health care plan), even though we can objectively afford it. I just hadn't planned on spending that much on health care, & am reminded of how lucky we've been with affordable health care for all of this time. A good reminder of how awful the system is in the US, and again, that's with us having been super lucky for a long period of time.
ReplyDeleteGlad you're enjoying the time with pets & family! Hope things get better for your daughter, and she can soon eat whatever her heart desires!
-Hawaii Planner
It's been challenging keeping kitten low activity. Plus, my daughter's getting emotional and sick of both her own recovery and eating restrictions. I'm ready for the week to end. Health insurance and access is the biggest consideration to my retirement timeline.
DeleteI hope things are better for your daughter soon too, Sam. You are definitely needed by many people who love and depend on you. :)
ReplyDeleteI know, and life is full. I just get overwhelmed with things out of my control, but also feel invisible at the same time.
DeleteNeither whiny NOR pathetic. You are adjusting to a present and future far different and painful than the one you had planned while trying to live each day with all of the emotions that come with that change, a sick kiddo. I mean, who needs financial concerns on top of all of that? Keep on keeping on. Talk is therapeutic and you do it here! Hugs.
ReplyDeleteI just need to write it out. I'm both overwhelmed and feel invisible.
DeleteYou certainly did not sound whiny nor pathetic. I figured you were just talking it out. Everyone needs to feel loved and needed.
ReplyDeleteThat's what I use the blog for.
Delete"Leading into March, and then the financial dings at seemingly every corner, I've been feeling very unnecessary, like I'm just occupying space in the world." I could have written this as well. State financial dings here too(due to moving to LA and Hubs not adjusting the withholding up so we owe $3K+ between Feds and State)and feeling very unnecessary(2 of my adult kids have discarded us like a pair of old shoes since we are no longer financially useful to them)and unwanted. Just trying to get healthier but in a holding pattern.
ReplyDeleteI hope you are feeling better and wanted. ;-)
I'm sorry this is happening in your family. I truly am. My son goes off the radar from time to time and I hate those periods. I know it's not the same, he just gets caught up in his own life and doesn't respond to texts or calls at times, for weeks. It's very annoying. You have Dan. Concentrate on your health and having quality time with him. Your kids is will or will not figure it out, but you deserve a good life anyway.
DeleteI sympathize with your daughter.
ReplyDeleteI just had major oral surgery.
I was in the chair for four hours!!!!
Now I'm just gumming eggs, potatoes pudding.
But I m old so it is taking
forever to heal.
You did not sound whiney or pathetic at all.
I'm so sorry for all you've gone through.
I know I couldn't be half as strong as you in the same situation.
Is this Cindy? I'm sorry for you too. I try to crunch elsewhere and make her at least flavorful food.
DeleteCertainly not whiny or pathetic! You're just trying to figure things out, and talking it through helps (I hope). Glad to see that daughter and kitten are healing. Your writings show how much you love and need your kids, and in turn how much they love and need you. You are very much necessary!
ReplyDeleteI'd be more of a mess without them. This week though has been a lot. This month has been a lot.
DeleteI understand your post so much. I was widowed at the very end of 2021. I have two children, both of whom are at home. The first year was easier financially for a variety of reasons. Last year was hard. I've been job hunting for quite a while and hopefully have found something. It will be nice to start to get things on the right track again. I keep focusing on gratitude for a warm home, food on the table, my beloved children, and the pets who add so much humor to our days.
ReplyDelete