Just a Life Post and Reminiscing
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Photo by cottonbro studio: |
The warmer temps are melting the big March 5th snow and things are soggy out there. No, it's pure mudd again. Trying to keep the house clean with the dogs is a challenge. I laugh at the big dog, who reluctantly lets me get his paws cleaned, but looks at me like he's wounded. Pup displays his angry old man persona as I try and wipe him down, giving him a few treats while he sits on the Muddy Paws rug that I hope is doing it's magic drawing in the dirt and wetness. I can have a clean house in my next life I guess because this one is literally for the pets.
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She's not a mudd maker, but a cuddler. |
My brother, I fear, is on a continued decline, though being back home has done wonders for his spirits. How long it might take to see if his latest treatment will do any good is unknown. We of course want to have hope, but it's also hard to see him in pain. My other brother decided he'd spend a few weeks here now, get some quality time with family. My sister-in-law is a rock. She's never not been family, having dated my brother since I was very young. I'm just trying to be helpful if I can, but not intrusive. I honestly don't know what's easier or harder with losing a life partner- no warning or any signs like I lost my husband, or the seeing and caring for them in illness. I just know it sucks, and yes, I know death is part of life, but it still sucks.
I'll have several visitations in the coming week as friends have lost parents. The first was a former 6th grade teacher and classmates dad. He had a part time job as the night manager at the grocery store where I worked my last year's of highschool and start of college. I got to know him as not just teacher and B's dad. That's when I first really understood that teachers don't make a lot of money and most had second jobs of some sort, and yet convinced me teaching is a noble career. As I was going into education, he was a good reference for me for years.
The other funeral is for a childhood neighbor friends mom. They've just put the house on the market after finally convincing her dad that the house and rural property was just too much. They built the home 52 years ago. I met C when as part of the neighborhood kids being nosy, her family came to check on progress at the build site. Her dad yelled at us to stay off the site (Dangerous but he was scary.) Ironically, two years later, my sister and I weren't there, C with other kids were at another house building site and she apparently was pushed into the dug hole and broke her leg. She started 5th grade in a cast and in crutches. That was the same school year I had the deep fryer accident on Christmas break, coming back bandaged, in crutches, to school after suffering 2nd degree and a few 3rd degree burns over my feet. One foot healed enough that I could stand on it, but the other took months to heal.
Anyway, her mom called us over to the car to have us introduce ourselves. Their kids were 8-C, 7-T, 6-J and a baby-J and she saw that her kids would have instant friends, which turned out to be true. C and I drifted apart in junior high in friends circles, but stayed friendly. She was one of my apartment roommates in college for a year, after she transferred to the University from Community College. She had a crappy first marriage, but later met P, and they have a daughter the same age as my youngest. Occasionally she and her husband join trivia. She's been there for me the last few years.
The data system person is hired, but not starting until Friday, March 21. With essentially my last working day being the 27th, and no Mondays or Fridays, it'll be a lot to transfer in a short period of time. They're a transfer from another division, so at least they'll have all security and training required already to be eligible to access the IT systems. I'm trying to think ahead to what other access can be set up in advance to prevent any other delays. I'll be flexible the week of March 31, but not giving up the week completely.
I think I've reminisced and rambled enough. What's been going on in your lives?
Childhood friends have been there thru all the ups and downs in life. I have several that I keep in touch with regularly. Death is a part of life and it does suck.
ReplyDeleteIt's hard picking up and moving forward.
DeleteBig news around here-DD and her boyfriend have adopted a cat. A one year old tuxedo girlie with thumbs. Other than that, not much excitement. I’m on PTO this week and the weather is gorgeous. With the time change and the warm weather I feel like a brand new person. January and February were pretty awful and I’m glad they are over. JoAnn
ReplyDeleteWe've had nice temps, even with yesterday's cool down it was still sunny and good walking. But, avoiding soppy paths from all the snow melt is a challenge. Congratulations to your daughter in her cat. I've definitely developed a fondness for them.
DeleteI was on vacation and now I am back, I miss Germany! I am glad you can support those around you and have their support in return during the ups and downs of life.
ReplyDeleteHow exciting that you went to Germany. Do they think there's any good for us here?
DeleteMy cousin (who we stayed with) I think is concerned about American politics - but tbh Germany is also kinda heading off to the right side of politics - we discussed politics a lot and I think the consensus is that he at least gets that Prez Cheeto is bonkers and so are those who think like him! I am excited for your trip in November to the UK just based on my own little trip!!
DeleteIt's been a mix of busy days, followed by quieter ones, which I feel like is our routine now that we just have Nick at the house. He's rarely home, but when we have something going on (like, dinner with 3 additional friends last night) the house is packed. We are taking him skiing this weekend, with a bunch of friends, to celebrate turning 18. Also sort of a "re-do", after the trip where he was super sick over ski week. We're using free hotel rooms, & M & I have ski passes. I'll purchase some day passes for Nick as part of his birthday gift. It's crazy that my surprise baby is turning 18. - Hawaii Planner
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like good chaos in your house. Two adult children, though, if mine are any example, they'll always need you. Enjoy your trip.
DeleteWhat a beautiful cuddly girl, such a cute photo.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry to hear about your brother. Yes, death might be part of life but it doesn't make it any easier. xxx
She has brought so much additional love to the house. Her knife attacks ( sharp claws) seem to be a kitten stage she's growing out of.
DeleteWe lose parents, we lose spouses, we lose siblings, we lose friends, we lose them all. And it doesn't make death any easier. Much love to you.
ReplyDeleteThank you and No, expecting death doesn't make it easier. I am not impressed with people that think they have the right to tell others how to grieve and for how long.
DeleteSome days almost require thinking about times in the past, because that is what helped make us the present "us".
ReplyDeleteSadness, unfortunately, is part of life and it is something we all go through.
I still miss Mom and Dad, and TheHub's parents and brother terribly but I have gotten to the point where I think about them with smiles rather than grief, which is what they would have wanted.
I'm not fully there with my husband, but daily I'm still trying to literally pick up pieces from losing him unexpectedly. It's just so different than any other loss. I do have the good memories with other loved ones.
DeleteI'm sorry your brother is unwell and declining. I think losing loved ones is always devastating. Remembering loved ones and times past is natural, and if memories are good it can be comforting.
ReplyDeleteHe's a fighter and who knows, none of us do, if he has weeks, months, or surprises all and responds better than we could hope to the new treatment and has years. Just being able to have day treatments and not be in the hospital or care facility has boosted his strength.
DeleteSending hugs. Sorry to hear about your brother. Such a difficult time.
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed reading your description of the dogs. They sound like quite the characters!
The pets keep me in my toes. The mudd is causing havoc in my house, but I just manage as best I can.
DeleteI guess we expect to lose our parents but never our siblings - which is silly of course. Praying for your brother, his family and your family!
ReplyDeleteIn large families like mine with a 20 year spread, I guess I should be better prepared for aging siblings. My sister was so young when she had her aneurysm and died so unexpectedly. My in laws lost at both my husband at 61 and sister at 27- we just never know, so hope I treat all with care and love.
DeleteWe lost my cousin a feww days ago. He was sick for the past 6 years. Struggling daily and in December decided to go south. You are right, losing parents is different.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry for your loss. Six tears of pain and illness is a cruel way to have to live.
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